oh dear what's the date?
i am not sure.
days are lost to me.
they just pass by.
no memories.
no joy.
so what's the point?
i should be happy, but i am not.
things are looking hopeful, but i hopelessly depressed.
we should be celebrating, but i am sulking.
i don't know why i feel this way, but i do. yes, my grandfather is getting his surgery tomorrow, not sure if he is staying in the hospital or coming. then on thursday, my dad is going back to the cancer doctor to get an iv put in him, so that inserting kemo will be easier. he will be on kemo for 3 at first, the doctors will see if it is helping and then continue another 3 months. so a grand total of 6 months...but this is all just second hand information so i am not sure what is true and what is not.
so i should be happy about all that, but i don't know what to feel or think anymore. my headaches and nausea have returned. so they don't really help the whole concentration part.
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